I recently read a book titled He’s Just Not That Into You, the inspiration for one of my favorite movies. I read this book based on a strong recommendation from my best friend; “this book will change your life”, she told me. So I breezed through this self-help book in about 3 days. My first time through I thought it was awesome, real, inspiring, helpful, and downright hilarious. However, when I began to reflect on some of the ridiculous stories about these women and their horrible relationships I thought, I am not like them.
I am not the girl who dates a married man thinking he will leave his wife for me. I am not the girl who stays with a guy even though he won’t show any sort of physical affection for her. I am not the girl who tries to sleep with her best guy friend in hopes that he’ll magically fall in love with her.
My romantic experiences have been much more simple than these. Every relationship described in the book is bizarre and crazy. No matter what the circumstances, the author’s response was the same, “he’s just not that into you.” What I don’t understand is why this book is so obviously misogynistic. Any time a woman writes to Greg asking if she can make the first move or ask a guy out, he seems appalled at the idea. He claims that if a guy is interested in you, he will pursue you and fight for you. While this is probably true, Is our society still so incredibly old-fashioned that we as women cannot demonstrate our interest in someone? I think the answer would be yes.
Many times I have had the urge to want to tell a guy I’m chatting with “just ask me out already!” or go up to a guy and ask him to dance. Why is it that I still have to stand around and wait for someone to take my hand?
Guys are still supposed to lead when it comes to these things I guess.
I think I’m just torn about the ideals presented in this book. I’m looking for other comments and thoughts, because this truly stumps me. Ladies, read this book and let’s start a discussion. Fire away.